Friday, November 19, 2010

Friday...


It's Friday, finally! In keeping with the journey to lose weight, I weighed myself this morning and my offical weight is 235 pounds. I've was around 240 pounds about a week ago. Five less, but it's common for that, as I've noticed before the motivation usually gets side-tracked by some unforseen event and I gain it back to lose it again, thus the cycle repeats. Emotional eating is a fault I've had since as far as I can remember. In doing research, it's something millions of people struggle with.

Yesterday, I began a liquid diet regiment, which so far has been awesome. I was tempted yesterday to eat some regular foods, even going so far as to stop by Trader Joe's and browse around. What really kept me from giving in was reading the nutritional labels. There's so much fat content in everything today, not to mention tons of sugar. I'm amazed a lot of my friends who don't even bother reading the labels aren't diabetic. I probably would be had I not switched to diet carbonated beverages a few years back.

I also got some quality exercise in yesterday on the elliptical. I've been avoiding eating out at restaurants and fast food joints, but I'm planning on cheating in January, when I go out to California, where the In-N-Out Burgers are. Haven't tried the Protein Wraps they have, but I'm very anxious to do so.

Thanksgiving should be interesting. I will be spending it with my family in Columbus. Oh yeah, and today marks the first day I play my clarinet for the Salvation Army again. I promise I'll leave the ski mask at home...

Thanks for all your support & encouragement!! Have a great weekend!!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Psalm 1:1-2 "Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the LORD, and who meditates on his law day and night."

Thursday, November 18, 2010

AWESTRUCK...


It's been a very awestruck couple months. I found out last month that one of my friends I was really close with in junior high died in September. I hadn't kept up with him in years, but had recently reconnected with him on facebook. He, like myself, was overweight, and I can remember him being ridiculed by others. We used to enjoy school lunch together and I remember inviting him to my church a few times. When you find out someone you once knew dies unexpectedly, it's amazing how you wish you could get back those years you lost track of them.

While I don't know all the details surrounding his death, it was made known that he had some complications from having gastric bypass surgery. He also had a hole in his throat, which I'm uncertain as to how that happened. It's another wake-up call to dedicate this journey fully to accomplishing the goal.

On a positive note, I have a big show coming up in December at the Toledo Funny Bone, which I've never been to. Hopefully, I'll get some good footage of the show to share on my website. I'm also going out to L.A. in January, hoping to make some contacts for some future projects. Also, been working on video special chronicling this journey to be healthy, which will be completed by next fall.

I got to watch the video special of Hulk Hogan on A&E last night. It was so different to see another side of this larger than life character who I grew up watching, and who inspired me to "TRAIN, SAY YOUR PRAYERS, EAT YOUR VITAMINS, & BELIEVE IN YOURSELF..." It was a side of vulnerability from the years he spent breaking his back to entertain the masses. It was a sign of frailness, as he watched his family fall apart. While, I don't desire to see anything ill come towards him or his family, it was actually nice to see the real side of who he is. It was nice to see him come clean and admit his mistakes, so he could move forward, having learned from them.

Our society often tends to put those in the media and entertainment industry on a pedestal, and when they fall, we're the first to condemn them, never realizing they are human finite beings as well. Of course if you're a Christian, then your actions are automatically attributed to the God you serve. That's probably the biggest comedy of the human life, that He gets blamed for your actions. The most awesome thing about that, is He's already taken that blame, so that we don't have to pay for it. He has taken every warrant written with our name, and the sin we committed on it, and replaced it with His own name.

There is no tomorrow, there is only today, and a shadow of what was yesterday. The shadow proves there is light. Thank you for your constant support and encouragement!!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Psalm 103:10 - "He does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities."

Thursday, October 28, 2010

This Is The One Where I Geek Out Over Wrestling...


So this day has come and gone. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, so they say... I've actually set out to prove that's not always the case, but have yet to do so. Usually when someone says something isn't possible, doesn't make you want to prove them wrong? I can say that's the case for me about 90% of the time. Of course, if it's breaking a law, I'm not that eager to do so, but if it's an actual accomplishment in a field that I'm somewhat interested in, then why not?

I'm still anxiously awaiting the release of two DVD projects that I was fortunate enough to be apart of. One is Derrick Tennant & Friends, which was actually filmed last January. It was a great show, and from what I was told my set was the only one that didn't need editing so much. (Could it be because I always work clean?!?) The other one is a bigger deal, as I'm one of the comedians featured on Thor Ramsey's New Comedy Revolution 2. That particular DVD will be available on my website, once it's released. Be sure to get your copy there, as it will most likely be cheaper on my site than at a live show (SHHH!!! Don't tell anyone...)

As mentioned on my facebook yesterday probably my all-time favorite wrestling match was Bret Hart vs. Curt Hennig for the Intercontinental Championship at Summerslam 1991. The reason I say that is the technical wrestling alone was phenomenal! It was one of the first pay-per-views I actually watched live as it happened. Finding out later though, Curt Hennig was injured before the match even took place. Rather than forfeit the title, he chose to wrestle Bret Hart out of respect so that he could drop the title to him, which also turned out to be the first submission victory over Curt Hennig during that run in the WWF. That particular match actually launched Bret Hart's singles' career and made him my all-time favorite wrestler. I have a few other favorites, but no one come close to him. The picture above was actually when he walked by me in the hotel during Wrestlemania 8 weekend. I kind of froze up, but still managed to get a quick picture of him. Hopefully, I will get to meet him for real someday. So, you just witnessed me geek out over wrestling. It won't be the last time...

My efforts to succeed on this weight-loss/being more healthy journey were great today. I stayed under 1000 calories, and avoided foods containing a lot of sugar. I'm feeling much better physically, as foods with a lot of fat, etc. I've found tend to make me feel depressed afterward. Haven't been there in over a month, but as good as Five Guy's Burgers & Fries is, after I finish eating there, I always wonder why I went there in the first place. When you don't eat out as much, you save a ton of money, I must say.

Thank you again for your continued support! Friday (technically today), I'm hoping to go and meet Tobymac who will be signing autographs at Barnes & Noble near hear. If you see a picture later you will know I was successful! Have a great weekend! God bless!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Romans 12:1 - "Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship.”

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

GET A DREAM & HOLD ONTO IT!!!


I'm still here. What was once today, has now become yesterday, and there is no tomorrow. I've always been intrigued by that idea of there never being tomorrow. There's only today. We're only guaranteed that much. We spend so much of our life worrying about what other people think. I once heard an awesome quote from Bill Cosby. He said "I don't know what the secret to success is, but the secret of failure is trying to please everyone." No, I didn't hear that in a Jello Pudding commercial, either...

Not sure if I've ever offended anyone on stage, but I'm sure I have in real life. Sometimes I speak before I think things through (on occasion...) I remember offending someone at college because I said that all the guys in praise & worship bands were the ones who couldn't make it in real bands. I was actually repeating what one of my friends had told me, which at the time I thought was amusing, but looking back it was pretty harsh. Who am I to criticize someone using their specific talent for the glory of God??? It could just as easily been said about me with my comedy. Sometimes, especially when I first started I think I got a lot of sympathy laughs. Not in clubs, but mostly in churches does this seem to be the case. If you've been doing comedy a few years, you can usually tell if someone really is laughing or they're pretending to do so. I would rather people not laugh then to hear the shriek of fake laughs penetrate the room.

So I guess the moral of today's entry is basically everyone has a special talent they're good at. No matter how long it takes, try to find it! As I stated before on Facebook, those who criticize the dreams of others are too scared to live out their own. Don't let anyone tell you that you can't do something (unless it's a crime of course...) As the immortal Dusty Rhodes once said "Get a dream and hold on to it!!"

One of my dreams is to achieve this goal of mine, which in the last three days I've been able to stay away from foods with tons of sugar, and fat. I haven't gone over 1000 calories for each of the last three days. Food isn't the object of my attention. I've lost 5 lbs in the last three days. I want to thank everyone for your constant support... & find out what you're good at & go for it!!!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

1 Peter 1:24-25 - “For, All men are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of the Lord stands forever." And this is the word that was preached to you.”

Monday, October 25, 2010

Back From My First Poetry Reading...


Miss me? It's been a long month. I finally hit the big 32, and even hosted an episode of my radio show on my birthday. Had some awesome comedians call in to be be apart of it. I wouldn't say it was my best show, but there were some good times.

Tonight, (which was technically yesterday), I did my very first ever poetry reading at Books & Company. It was a wonderful experience. No, I didn't attempt to be funny, as it was more serious. They really seemed to enjoy it, and the same poem will be included in the apologetic book I'm writing. (Apologetic, meaning defense of the Christian faith... Not because I think it's going to wreak...) Funny thing about the poetry reading... I was actually wondering if I would have any hecklers. Tonight was great!!

This lifestyle change I've embarked on, thus far has been a huge challenge. Emotions run high when you're trying to lose weight. It's easy to second guess yourself, and think what you're doing is futile. People say things to you which are discouraging. Others think they're helping you by offering the kind of food you're trying to stay away from. For me right now, I'm going through a detox stage. As of now, I just made it passed the second day. The cravings are starting to vanish.

Thank you all for your encouragement, and constant support! Have a blessed rest of the week!!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Hebrews 4:12 - “For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Spite...


Another day has come and gone. Today, I got to substitute teach welding... as if I know how to do it... I was mainly there to make sure they didn't turn the torches on each other. My first year there, some kid smashed his fingertip, which was hanging off the edge of his finger. Lucky for me, when he came in the office to go to the nurse, he had his back to me, otherwise I would've spewed.

I kind of feel like I'm at a stop light in my life right now. You know, when you're waiting for answers that nobody knows? Well, almost nobody, but we know better than that. I'm trying to do some new things. If anyone's game, I got a poem to read on October 26th (Town & Country Books & Co. in Kettering, OH).

I mentioned earlier on my facebook page that "spite" is a good motivator to exercise. I don't know if that's true or not, or even if it's healthy to think that way. Most people when you're trying to lose weight are either encouraging or critical. For me, I feel like I let myself get overweight and keep it up for so long because eating is an easy way to relieve stress from criticism, worry, and other emotional issues. It's not easy to push away something you've gotten into the routine of doing for so long.

I'm between 233-232lbs right now. Exercised today, and did 30 minutes on the elliptical. I also ate healthy. I enjoyed some boneless, skinless, teriyaki chicken chunks (that's what they were called!!!) and some blueberries sweetened with splenda. I feel good right now. Better after typing all this and sharing it with everyone. Thank you again for your continued support and encouragement. Hope you have a great weekend coming up. I'm in for it tomorrow, as I'm subbing for a class which the last time I was in, I ended up writing up four girls. You know they'll be out for revenge... Peace Out...

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Romans 12:2 - “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—His good, pleasing and perfect will.”

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

New Season of Life...


Well, well, well... Look who decided to show up... Me!!! How's it going everyone? What a day today was... I decided to get out of my comfort zone, and go out... Of course, I didn't stray too far from it at Sam's Club. I figure since my Dad put me on his membership, I should get the most out of it. I love pulling out my card to show them at the door, and seeing them act like they don't care. Of course, if I didn't have it ready they'd act like homeland security, wanting to see it.

I bought some boneless, skinless chicken teriyaki nuggets (for lack of a better term...) They were awesome! I happened to notice the above image when I was pulling into the parking lot where Sam's is located. I gotta hand it to Jenny Craig. She's displaying one characteristic of Jesus Christ. She's meeting the broken, where they are.

Weighed myself today, and I was 233lbs. So, I got 68lbs to go. I must admit, I did stress out a little during my DVD taping, and probably ate what I shouldn't have. However, I'm back on track, and doing a lot more exercise. Today I did an hour on the elliptical.

I'm going to try something new later this month. As, I was looking on the website of Books & Company, which is a local bookstore in Dayton, I came across an events section. They've had some really well-known authors there in the past to sign books, and mingle, such as Anne Rice, Gene Hackman (yes, the actor), Mick Foley (yes, the wrestler), among others. Tonight they had Peter Farrow (of Peter, Paul, and Mary who wrote & sung "Puff The Magic Dragon"). I would've stayed for it, but I didn't have $16 to buy his book, which was required. But what I noticed, is they have a Poetry Night, where you can get up and read your work to others. Never done it before, but I've written a few poems, so I'm going to be there at the Town & Country Books & Company in the Joe Mugg's Cafe on October 26, at 7:30pm to read a Rich Jones Classic Poem. Be there or be square... whatever that means... They told me I have to be clean and family appropriate, as if I wouldn't be... I find it so funny when a comedian who's always dirty attempts to work clean, and complains about how difficult it is. I'm not saying I'm always funny, but it's not hard when you've never worked dirty. The moral of the story... Be family friendly!! You'll get a lot more respect.

Thank you all for your attention. I appreciate all the encouragement, and hope you have a blessed rest of the week!!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Jeremiah 29:11 - “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Pippi will always come out on top!!!


What a fun day today was! I went hiking at Sugar Creek Metro Park, near Bellbrook, OH. It's a nice place to hike, a little more busier than Grant Park, which is probably my favorite, but long trails, and I even saw a deer today. My faithful Chihuahua, Zelda came along and scared off any coyotes. Actually, I did hear a few coyote's howling off in the distance. That's when I turned around and took another trail. It got me thinking about the small inconveniences we face in our daily life. Maybe if you're running late to something, or you can't make it to somewhere because you're ill. How many of those could've been times when you were saved from something that could've resulted in a major accident or some large unfortunate event. Yeah, I've probably watched way too many M. Night Shymalan movies, but it does make you wonder. We must've hiked at least 3-4 miles today, and it was beautiful!

If you saw my tweet earlier about getting rude customer service in Friendly's I must say it's not true. That was just an attempt at a joke. (Yeah, cause their name is Friendly's?!? Yeah...) I think some people took it serious. If you haven't figured it out by now, the majority of my tweets and facebook statuses are just me trying out new material to see what kind of a response it will get. Of course, even the most unfunny thing you read, could get the biggest laugh depending on how it's delivered live. However, I enjoy trying to pull off the joke in written form none the less...

I got a few movies today in the mail from Amazon.com. Never Cry Wolf, which is a classic Disney movie they made us watch way back when in science class at school. It's about this guy who goes up to Alaska to find out why the caribou are dying off, which is blamed on the wolves. Interesting flick, not very action-packed, but still enjoyable. I also got Something Wicked This Way Comes. We had to watch that in school a few times. Ray Bradbury story, that was good, especially with the underrated acting of Jonathan Pryce, who played Mr. Dark, and the late great actor Jason Robards. Also got the recent Adam Sandler flick involving stand-up comedy, Funny People. Not sure how appropriate it will be, but wanted to give it a chance. Finally, I got the New Adventures of Pippi Longstocking, because Pippi will always come out on top!!!

In "dieting", for lack of a better term, been doing good. I enjoyed some non-fat plain yogurt from Trader Joe's today. I learned a neat trick for flavoring it way back when. Add any flavor of Sugar-Free Jello mix to it, and it's instant flavor! More as it comes... Thank you guys for the opportunity to share my life with you! Thank you for your encouragement!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Isaiah 26:4 “Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD, is the Rock eternal.”

Monday, October 4, 2010

The Warrior In Me...

Gosh, it's been almost a week since my last entry. One of my career goals was finally achieved, and will for sure be one of many to come. The show with Thor Ramsey went awesome!! The DVD project is in post-production and hopefully will be available for release within the next three months. The turnout was great!! I had a wonderful spot on the show... Right in the middle!!! Don't want to spoil everything, but hopefully a national distribution deal comes of this soon, because it was a killer show!!

On a side note, I'm officially single again... I kind of already was, but it's actually official now... That's not an open invite or anything... It's funny, because being single actually brings out the warrior in me. It's kind of like being on the hunt, and wanting to be conditioned for it. Although, I'm really focusing on career & ministry goals right now, God is in control.

Today, I went hiking for the first time in quite a while. Got some awesome photos, as I was walking the trails. Grant Park in Centerville, OH is one of my favorite places to go. If I don't sub tomorrow, I want to go again to another trail, possibly Cox Arboretum. I've never been there. The only drawback is you can't take pets. My dog, Zelda loves hiking!! I may just go to another where I can actually take her. Here's some shots of today's journey into the woods...



As I continue on this spiritual journey to lose weight and grow in Christ, I've been working on my book. Today, I focused on writing a chapter involving the call of someone the world had no hope in. He was delivered from death, and eventually became a great prophet that helped shape the world he lived in. More as it is written, but hopefully some of you will find your story is similar. I'm finding mine is every day. Going at it tooth & nail... Thanks to everyone who believes...

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Isaiah 55:6 - “Seek the LORD while he may be found; call on him while he is near.”

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

One More Day...


Another day has come and gone, and I still have the Pippi Longstocking theme song stuck in my head. I can honestly say I never even saw the movie from start to finish. I remember commercials for it, and the song would play. It's a catchy tune for sure...

Tomorrow, I'm substitute teaching for Science. I got to see the lesson plans online, and I'm supposed to show the movie Gattaca. I've never seen that one either, but I know Ethan Hawke & Uma Thurman are in it. Betcha anything, they try to get me to do stand-up instead of watching it... Maybe not, but they did for sure when I had to show that Al Gore documentary, "An Inconvenient Truth"... Of course, I would've rather watched me do stand-up then sit through that. Not that I'm trying to open a political can of worms here, but it was just boring...

Tomorrow is also the day before the big taping. I'm anxiously awaiting that, not only because I have to drive three & a half hours each way... Maybe I'll put the Pippi Longstocking theme on a road trip mixtape...

I must admit, I am a little nervous. It's like you get to that one point in your life where you feel you worked hard, and a big break is coming, and you wonder if you can deliver. It's kinda like when you beat a level of Super Mario Bros. & at the end you hear "Thank you Mario, but our Princess is in another castle...." I'm confident the Holy Spirit will give me the courage to make the most of this opportunity. Plus, I bought these sweet new Airwalks, I'm dying to walk out on stage in... Wanna thank you guys for tuning in to support me. Have a blessed rest of the week!!!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

John 3:20-21 - “Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God.”

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

This Friday is the Big One!!!


Been on hiatus since last weekend... Were you able to hold down the fort? I had an awesome show last weekend with Comedian David Ferrell at Thomas More College in Crestview Hills, KY. Got to perform for the incoming freshmen, and their parents. The new farmville joke seemed to go over well.

This Friday is the BIG ONE!! I'm doing a DVD taping with Thor Ramsey, who's the host of the comedy show Bananas. I'm not sure if they're even still on, but it was an awesome show! I remember watching it when I first got into comedy, and thinking I would be on it in a couple months... I had the impression I would be working with Thor Ramsey sometime my first year of comedy... Well, a few months turned into nearly five years of pursuing this calling. I've gone from not getting any laughs at all, to getting kicked off the stage in a Christian Haunted House where they show you what Hell is supposed to look like, to doing a show in the ghetto and barely making it out alive, to people being rude and telling me to my face that I'm not funny and a loser, to meeting some awesome comics who've helped me along the way, and getting to work with Thor Ramsey...

I'm not going to sit here and type that I did this all on my own. Because if you saw me when I first started, then you saw me doing it on my own. There were no laughs, and it was horrible. You would've expected to see me in a nursing home, opening for that guy on the Soprano's who got absolutely no laughs. The opportunities that have presented themselves over the years have totally been of God. Anyone who thinks they see talent in me, I can vouch the majority of my successes have been because God placed awesome people in my life who weren't afraid to share their time and talent with me, and the result of God giving me a humble spirit when I accepted their help. One of the best motivational posters I've ever seen says that no one gets anywhere by themselves. There is no such thing as a self-made man.

My challenge for you as I continue on this spiritual and healthy journey is to be humble in all areas of your life. You never know where your next opportunity will come from, and it's important to be teachable. Thank you for this opportunity to share with you! Thank you also for the encouragement...

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Luke 14:11 - "For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Five Gold Stars!!!


About to fall asleep... What a great day today was!! I finally got 5 gold stars on my subbing performance. Who would've thought they'd still be giving gold stars when you become the teacher?!? Here's the report...

How long did this substitute teach for you?* Full school day

Did you leave lesson plans? If yes, did the substitute follow your lesson plans?* Yes, and yes

Were assignments collected and left in order by periods?* n/a

Did the substitute leave notes regarding substituting in your class?* yes

Were absences and other records kept accurately?* yes

Was your teaching area left in good order?* yes

From all indications, was classroom control good?* yes

Did the substitute have to adjust your lesson plans? If "YES", were the adjustments appropriate? If the adjustments were NOT appropriate, please explain.* no

Did the students have a reaction to the substitute teacher? If "YES", what were they?* yes, positive and said he was funny

Would you want this person to substitute for you again?* yes

It's always good when someone recognizes your hard work. It brings such a good feeling. But it's important not to stop there because God sees all. He's truly our audience of one. I'm finding joy in the journey of wanting to please Him more and more every day, and the awesome thing is I feel His grace helping me to do so. Not that I base my faith on my feelings, because tomorrow, I could wake up feeling like I had food poisoning, but there's somethings you know, and others you rely on your faith and hope which God has blessed you with.

Got some big shows coming up, and today I started phase one of the South Beach Diet. I'm not going into too much detail, but it feels great. Thank you guys for your support!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Proverbs 15:3 "The eyes of the LORD are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good."

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The Road That Leads To Heaven...


Life just never seems to turn out the way you want it to. If you would've asked me even 6 years ago, I would've never told you I was going to be a comedian. Nor, would I have said that a long the way, I would substitute teach. The subs we had when I was in school were some of the most eccentric characters. We loved to torment them, although anything from me was just teasing. I never had it in for any of them. My favorite sub I ever had was Jim Sexton. He's no longer subbing, but so many people remember him, and we reconnected with him to invite to our recent school get-togethers. He used to write his name on the board for all to see so they would know how to refer to him. "MR. SEXTON..." Quite a few times I erased the "N" and replaced it with a "Y". Fun times!

Getting back to life, it's crazy how things happen that we don't expect. I took a job working at an inner-city church plant a few years back. My youth group was no where near the size of these mega churches, and I couldn't make enough to live off of. That's actually when I started to substitute teach, just prior to finding out someone from my Christian college stole my identity, which lead to my "CALLING to COMEDY..." Just you wait until the movie comes out...

For those of you who don't know, I went to Boyce College, which initially was a Bible College. I loved it, but many times it drove me crazy, because so many people came at me, trying to win me over to their specific theological views, and many of them made me go "HUH?!?"... I went for Youth Ministry. After the first semester I was there, two of the guys I ran with decided to withdraw from school. I heard quite a few people question their calling to ministry. Then I began to question my own. Of course later on, He would take me in a different direction, one of comedy, but looking back, I don't question it at all. It was a season of my life, where God refined me, and prepared me for something bigger. I had the opportunity to help lead in prayer seven individuals to a saving relationship with Jesus Christ, and even today I had the chance to be an example in a certain situation at school. I couldn't give the full plan of salvation being I was at school, but they know I do comedy, so they might go to my site and learn about salvation.

I enjoyed a banana for breakfast, and the new flat bread chicken sandwich from Taco Bell for lunch. Eating sparingly, it's been a great challenge, but I'm beginning to see the results. I had a strange craving today for Gushers, but the Lord delivered me to some healthy low-cal popcorn instead...

This continued journey is definitely refining me. I pray that you come to the point where you allow God to refine you too, because as singer, Steven Curtis Chapman says "There's no better place on earth than the road that leads to Heaven..." Thank you all, and have a blessed new day!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

2 Corinthians 13:14 “May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all.”

Monday, September 20, 2010

The Zombie Face...


Wow, what a day! I started out subbing for Health Science, which I have no idea what all that entails. I just know everyone in class with the exception of me, was wearing scrubs, which I feel is the muumuu of the professional world... Not really, I just like to say the word muumuu...

Before I knew it, I ended up finishing out the day subbing in carpentry. Really, all we did was go to a job site, and I did my zombie face for the students who weren't actually working, because there wasn't enough equipment for them to use. Some kid took a picture of it, so be forewarned if you see a zombie face that looks like me, it probably is... The same person that put me with the Jonas Brothers did the picture above... Thanks Ivy!! I love it!!!

Halloween is coming soon, or Fall Fests, if that's what you dig. Hopefully you won't lose respect for me, but I do like horror movies. I'm not obsessed with them, but I used to be terrified by them. Then my friend, Cory brought Child's Play 3 to my house and got me to watch it. How stupid was that movie?!? I overcame that fear, and started watching all of them to show how brave I was. Wanna hear a funny story?!?

Hopefully, he doesn't read this blog, but my cousin's like 6 years younger than me, and I used to hang out with him when I went to my Grandma's house. During my big horror movie crusade when I watched them all to prove I wasn't scared, I convinced him to watch the first Chucky movie, but I had to promise to fast forward through all the death scenes. So I did, and of course he was cool enough not to tell on me. About a week later, my Grandma bought him a My Buddy doll, he was terrified of it, and she couldn't figure out why...

I actually did my zombie face with make-up on, at Scaremare years ago. Scaremare is what most people call a "Reality House". Basically, it's the Christian alternative to a haunted house where they show you what Hell is going to look like, and then explain how you can become a Christian. I jumped up & down a lot, and a little girl thought I was mechanical.

It's so weird how do like to scare ourselves watching movies or riding scary rides. Even driving too fast can be a little frightening, yet it still gives us that rush we love. I just want to challenge you though to consider that life is precious. What you fill your life with has the ability to consume it. As mentioned in yesterday's blog, the heart is the one thing that we take with us out of this world. What's in your heart?

Thank you guys for the opportunity to make you laugh, cry and everything in between... God Bless and thank you for your continued support!

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Psalm 26:2 "Test me, O LORD, and try me, examine my heart and my mind;"

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Entertaining Angels...


The weekend is almost over... Another hour and a half till an official manic Monday...

I had a great time this weekend chillin' with fellow alumni from Fairmont High School. I had an interesting thought today, which I'm sure I will relay in the book I'm working on. Lately, I've been thinking about in the Bible where it talks about those who entertained angels. Several times it's scene in Bible where people did it, unknowingly. Which brings me to my observation. Being that I'm involved in the comedy world, if I've ever entertained an angel, does that mean that the demons are hecklers?

Let's face it, they do exist. Personally, I don't believe there's a demon under every rock, but those who are saved by Jesus Christ, have nothing to fear, because He is stronger than any power that has, is, or ever will be. James 4:7 says "Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you."

There's times I feel like it will never get any better. Especially on this journey to lose weight and live more healthy. It's hard to have faith. Of course, faith that is seen is not faith at all. I always get the visual of Indiana Jones walking across the cliffs, and imagining how that would feel if I was in that situation. Really, all of us are each day. We're not falling into a physical chasm, but rather a spiritual one. Often people say that God only helps those who help themselves. I even heard Bo & Luke Duke quote their Uncle Jesse, who had said that. I hate to say it, but Uncle Jesse is WRONG!!! If we could honestly help ourselves, than there was no reason for Jesus Christ to die on the cross. However, He did... There's only one thing we take from this world, into the next, which I hope for all of you would be Heaven. What we take, is our heart. So let's make our heart worth more than anything by giving it over to Jesus Christ.

If you guys think I've been a little too preachy tonight... Tough!!! Thank you so much for tuning in. I appreciate all of you giving me encouragement, and pray you have a blessed week! As far as health wise, I'm doing much better eating and physical training. Stay tuned!!

Forever In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Hebrews 13:2 "Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it."

Friday, September 17, 2010

Can't Wait To See You Tomorrow, Kuntz!!!


It's late Friday night, and technically I guess you could consider this Saturday morning. What an amazing day. I don't think I touched on this yet, but I happened to watch the movie, Flywheel for the first time the other day. It was very awesome! At first I thought it was going to be cheesy, because they shot it all with a digital camera to keep the cost down. It looked like a skit from a Sunday morning sermon. But it was much more than that!! They took a $20,000 budget, and made a masterpiece! It's rare that I ever say this, but that movie has challenged me to have more faith, and I saw it today, when I could've taken a short cut, yet I chose to honor my Savior.

If you haven't seen the movie, I highly recommend it! I worked on my book today. In fact, I've come to the conclusion, that I'm going to finish it all as one book with three parts. Of course the animated features will be separate. Keep checking back. We got some awesome people on board once it's ready for the movie production.

God is doing great things! As I mentioned before I'm doing a college gig next weekend at Thomas More College in Crestview Hills, KY. The Friday after that, I'm doing the DVD taping with Thor Ramsey. It's gonna be a blast!

Doing great eating. I enjoyed some GNC Wheybolic Extreme Protein Shakes today. They told me that the extreme ones will help me from losing muscle mass and rather fat, unlike the regular version. I pretty much just smiled and nodded.

Hope you guys have a great weekend! Tomorrow I'm getting together with some high school alumni and hopefully gonna chill with my old football coach, whom I'm pictured with above... Stay tuned for some upcoming Rich Jones Show Episodes...

God Bless!

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Philippians 2:3-4 “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Why I Despise Horses...


Hello everyone! How are you? I found out today I have the opportunity next weekend to perform for Thomas More University's incoming students and their families. I'm very excited because it's going to be my 3rd college gig, and the following week I will be doing a DVD taping with Thor Ramsey!

Tomorrow, I will be substitute teaching for Vet Science. They actually meet at the Humane Society, which will bring back quite a few memories for me, because my first job was in an animal shelter. I got bit so many times, but the worst experience was probably when I had to walk a doverman right after it had been spayed. It was insane!

Oh yeah, I've been telling this story a lot lately, so I might as well tell it here. People always ask me why I don't like horses. It goes back to my experience at Camp Kern back when I was a 4th grader. Our school went, and gave us the option if we wanted to ride a horse, it was an extra $5. So thinking it would be so awesome, I chose to do so. I ended up getting on this horse named Pride. The horse seemed fine at first. About 40 feet later it kept bending over to eat grass, and not following the guide. She kept telling me to pull it's reigns up. A puny 4th grader like I was, I couldn't muscle enough strength up to do so. Finally, she gets off her horse and comes over to mine, and smacks it upside the head. It went about 40 feed uncontrollably, and then bent over to eat more grass. The guide came running up, and then I said to her, "Mam, if you're going to hit him again, can I get off first?!?" It was like the day before my birthday, and I almost didn't make it. So ever since then I've steered clear of horses.

Doing pretty well with this life-style change. Thank you guys for your continued support!

In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Philippians 4:6 - Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Calling...


The crowd in the church looked on with intensity as none of them wanted to laugh. Frederick set up the joke, "Christians, we never gossip..." The crowd became even more silent. "We just have detailed prayer requests." There was no reaction. It was as though a silent bullet had just been fired into the heart of the comedian, as a split-second became the length of an eternity. Five seconds later a cackle from the corner of the room started a chain reaction that would overcome the room with laughter. It was as though an angel had been entertained, as was the case...

The above is an excerpt from book three of the trilogy I'm writing. The site shall be up soon. Stay tuned. I don't want to give away the entire story yet, but imagine you're called to be something, and you have to rise above what you are now to do it. What would be your first step?

In relation to my healthy journey, Doing good. I had a banana for breakfast, and today I'm subbing for Criminal Justice. Have a free period right now, and there's a drawer full of Reese's Cups... Let's just say I shut it without a second thought... Hope you guys have a great day! I love hearing from all you, and thank you for your support!

Abiding,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

1 Samuel 16:7
But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

Monday, September 13, 2010

Just Walked 5 Miles!!!


It's hard to believe it myself, but I just finished a 5 mile walk! So much can be reflected in that amount of distance and time. As some of you might know, I've been working on writing a book more seriously in the last 6 months. It's still in development. Today, I worked on it some during my break at school. In the next week I'm going to launch the official website of the book which is actually going to be a series, even though it's not finished yet. My hope is that it will motivate me to finish it, as well as network for the opportunities once it's complete. More news on that as it comes.

Today was a Subway day for me. There's not a lot of food places around where I work. I don't like to eat school food, because I feel as though I suffered through that enough, plus I can't drink chocolate milk anymore without thinking a traffic light will start beeping and prevent me from conversing out loud for five minutes. I hope no one else is scarred with that notion. They had LaRosa's pizza at school today, which many people ate. Someone told me about it, but I'm finding it's best to avoid pizza all together. I ate a ton of pizza in college which I'm sure contributed to my freshman 50... My all-time favorite pizza place in Louisville is this local chain called Tony Boombozz. They offered gourmet pizza at a low price, and delivered to my dorm, which I probably got at least once a week. I could eat one of their mediums all by myself, and then I would save the 2nd medium for the next day, since I always had a coupon for 2 mediums. I thought with my belly and less with my head a lot back then.

Rather than make the mistake of eating pizza today, which would probably have just gotten me craving it more, I chose Subway. The awesome thing was I got a footlong, and only ate half. The rest was my dinner later. My sub of choice is the Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki, on honey oat wheat bread without mayonnaise or any fattening dressing. I get tons of veggies and it's awesome!

Tomorrow, I'm teaching Aviation. I have no idea what to say to them. Personally, I hate flying. It's a necessary evil. The main thing I hate about it is going through the airport security, and waiting on the ground. One time I dozed off on a plane, and woke up to some kid yelling "WE'RE CRASHING!!", because the plane made a sharp turn. Scared the daylight out of me! I say don't spoil the child, and don't spare the taser in that situation...

Thank you guys again for tuning in. I'm really excited. I know God is doing great things! Have a blessed week!

In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Philippians 2:1-2 - "If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose.”

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Down Five Pounds!!!


I'm going to start reporting my weight more, because It gives me hope and determination. So I check this morning and I dropped 5 pounds. I'm 235. So I need to drop another 70 before I reach my goal. Today, I encountered much temptation, although I didn't dwell on it. I went into two grocery stores, and even had the urge to get a great take-n-bake pizza from Papa Murphy's. In good time, but not without some serious hard work, and changing the way I see things.

Doesn't everyone seem to have a diet figured out? Everyone knows what to do. I have family members (not immediate, I say...) who shove advice in my face every holiday of how to pull it off. For some reason it never worked for them. Without being overly critical, my whole opinion of the dieting scene has changed. It's all about life-style modification.

On a different note, I watched the Adventures of Pinocchio, today. You may have scene it in the cheap $5 bin at Wal-Mart. This is the version with Jonathan Taylor Thomas and Martin Landau. It's supposed to be more like the original story, however it wasn't as much as it could've been. The original story by Carlo Collodi, who died before the 20th Century, and never even saw what Disney did to his creation, painted a totally different story. Pinocchio was rather HORRIBLE to Geppetto, his creator. He had him put in jail. He sells his school book that Geppetto bought him by selling his only coat, just to see a marionette show. He also killed the cricket that Disney would later name Jiminy, and his ghost is actually the conscious. Of course, he got with the program and changed his ways later on, but there's such a sadness when you think about the situation of Geppetto trying to care for his creation that continually pushes him away. There's such a similarity between mankind and God there. One of my recent facebook statuses I posted was a quote I thought of myself. "Real life begins when you wake up from the nightmare of sin into the salvation of Jesus Christ."

So things are going great for me right now, which means troubles probably just around the corner. I'm subbing almost every day this week. Tomorrow, I get another day of In-School-Suspension, which surprisingly wasn't that bad last time. We shall see... Thank you guys and have a great week!

In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Romans 8:18 - "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us."

Saturday, September 11, 2010

YAY OSU!!!


So the Ohio State Buckeyes defeated the Miami Hurricanes today... My parents were in attendance. I'm glad they won because it makes my parents happy, but I only watch one sport which is pre-determined any... You can guess what that is. I sort of have to cheer for OSU because if it wasn't for that fine institution, I wouldn't be alive. I'm sure I would be into the game if I was actually in the arena, but I've never been able to watch many team sports on TV.

UFC rocks, although I'm more into the earlier years because Royce Gracie was a machine! It was more interesting to me when it was different fighting style against different fighting style. I'll never forget the opening fight of the first ppv, when Gerard Gordeau, a martial artist, blasted Teila Telu, a sumo wrestler in the face, the first 26 seconds, knocking his teeth out and winning the fight. It was interesting to me because where else would these guys ever fight? I even caught a youtube video of a K-1 fight from Japan where Royce Gracie, my all-time favorite, who is a little Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu guy beat the world famous sumo wrestler, Akebono Taro by submission with a wrist lock! It's so fascinating to me!

Of course with the newer styles in UFC where everyone is cross-training with all these hybrid fighting styles, it's still amazing to watch, but it's not as intriguing to me as it once was. I have a theory that Royce Gracie even through his last big UFC fight to Matt Hughes, just because they wanted to go out with the old and in with the new UFC. I even presented this theory to Christian Comedian Brad Stine who loves MMA, but he contends Gracie never adapted to the new style. Here's my theory. First of all, Gracie got paid more to lose than he ever got paid to win in the early UFC PPV's. In the fight Matt Hughes actually beat Gracie in a stand up striking series. If you watch any of Gracie's old matches, he never ever tried to defeat an opponent without making it a ground battle, and attempting to choke them out. The biggest difference is Royce Gracie never talked negative about one of his opponents in a pre-match interview. He always showed respect. In the interviews leading up to the fight, they showed Gracie alleging that Matt Hughes was "jealous" of him. You decide. I think it was fixed.

With all this said, and since I ranted an "Oliver Stone-like" observation about UFC, just want to say, my own journey for training in the fight against being unhealthy, is coming a long awesome! It seems like whenever I'm trying to avoid foods with lots of fats, is when my family decides to be generous. Like last week my Dad came home with Buffalo Wild Wings for me, and considering I was at my Grandma's last night there were tons of options for cookies, all of which I turned down!! This is kind of crazy, but my Grandma was actually a diabetic a few years ago, and for whatever reason the doctor told her she doesn't have anymore issues with it. Last weekend she ate an ENTIRE box of Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies in a day!!! I could've probably pulled that off in junior high but not at age 84, unless I wanted to see Jesus that day...

So it's going good. Thank you guys again for all your support! Got even more subbing dates, and thanks to Comedian Derrick Tennant who referred to me as "Mr. High Energy" on the DVD taping I did with him, which I showed the students I subbed for last spring, I got referred by that on Friday from some kid who wouldn't stop calling me that. Gotta love subbing...

In Him,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Proverbs 21:31 - "The horse is made ready for the day of battle, but victory rests with the LORD."

Friday, September 10, 2010

Watching WWE Classics on Demand... All is right!!!


The weekend is here!! I'm up late here at my Grandma's house watching WWE Classics on Demand. There's a classic battle on right now between Kevin Von Erich and Freebird Terry Gordy. The classic Von Erich/Freebird feud is one of the greatest rivalries in the history of professional wrestling. I've actually heard in interviews they worked "snug" or "stiff" in those matches to make the feud believable. So, most of their matches were like real fights. I've yet to watch one of their matches and be bored with it.

Just noticed on the floor near bye is a CD collection of 80's songs. It's a collection my sister in North Carolina left when she was up here. I thought about borrowing it to put on my iPod, until I realized they're not the original artists. It's the infamous Countdown Singers, which is probably why my sister left it. Does anyone actually buy those if they know in advance it's the Countdown Singers??? I wonder if the Countdown Singers have any groupies that follow them around the country. It's weird they make a living copying off the original artists and selling the recordings by putting their band name in small-print in the bottom corner of each album.

The point of my above observations is why settle for anything that isn't the best? Is there a reason why you would want something that isn't real? I think the biggest thing we try to substitute is love. We look for it everywhere. Today I observed students during my subbing gig reading glamour magazines that try to tell them how they should look. I'm all for taking care of yourself. That's really one of the main reasons I do this blog, but to be told "how" you have to look. It blinds them into thinking they're not good enough. I was trying to think what it would take to open their eyes. One thing I came up with is the love and support of their father. Anyone have any suggestions? Obviously, the love of Christ is the A++ answer...

Today was a great day for me. I set a goal to outdo yesterday's performance, and I accomplished it. Plus, I made a new friend in Tuna Albacore Steaks. Kudos to all you who are supporting me! Got some big comedy dates coming up and some even bigger potential ones. Have a great weekend! GO OSU!!!

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Romans 8:39 - "neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Weak Day...


How's it going? This won't be a long entry. Today seemed to start out good, but by the end of the day I felt so depressed. Honestly, I didn't eat the healthiest I could've. I didn't pig out, but what I had wasn't the best. It was a weak day for me. I feel right now like I had a ton of energy drinks, and I'm just coming off of a large sugar high, which is totally not the case.

I shall rebound and give my all tomorrow. One comforting thought I have right now is my all has an end, but Jesus Christ has an endless all... So I'm about to pray and go to bed so I can wake up tomorrow and start off better. Thank you guys. Sorry for messing up today...

In Him,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Isaiah 43:2-3a - "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;"

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

I survived In-School-Suspension...


I had the worst trouble sleeping last night. It was the craziest thing. Lately, I've been falling asleep to movies, so I turned on Stephen King's Rose Red. It's a long movie I just happened to pick up at Half-Price Books the other day for cheap. I watched half the movie and was starting to get tired, but I had to go to work in 2 hours, so rather than attempt to sleep, I hit the elliptical and got my energy going to last through the work day. My first day back from the summer and they put me with the bad kids.

Actually, there were only two of them, and they didn't misbehave at all. I probably talked to them more than they talked to me, just so I could stay awake. They were incoming juniors who happened to get caught for smoking, and were sentenced to a week in there. The girl in the class room actually thought I was a student when I tried to open the door in the morning. Then later on during my lunch break, the teacher who relieved me told me I could go in the staff lounge because they were talking about their various experiences with road kill, like that's something I want to hear about, around lunchtime... I ended up walking in the hallway for a few minutes and started to converse with a student I knew from last year. We talked on the way to the cafeteria, and then I tried to leave, and this teacher doing hall duty asked me where I was going... mistaken again!!

Wasn't a bad day at all. I enjoyed my Trader Joe's Pink Lady Apples for lunch, and came home for a nice afternoon nap. I'm stoked for tomorrow!! I have a bunch of comedy show opportunities coming up, and God is bringing them out of nowhere... I'm excited about what He's going to do! Thank you for tuning in and for your support!

In Him,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Psalm 71:19 - "Your righteousness reaches to the skies, O God, you who have done great things. Who, O God, is like you?"

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

The Bats Stalked Me...


So I looked up as I was lifting weights outside in the yard. The sky was turning gray, as the rain had just passed, and it tends to get dark earlier this time of year. As I gazed up from my bench press, I saw hovering over me a swarm of BATS!!! They live in the chimney stack of the Board of Education building across the street from my house. Most nights they come out and fly around the neighborhood, not wandering to far from their dwelling. Of course, the real bloodsuckers were the mosquitoes that kept chasing my arms through each rep I did. I don't think any of them caught up with me, although if they did they would've been drinking vintage AB Negative blood, which only 1% of all Americans have. I should pull a Kramer and put my blood in the fridge...

My Dad's had this sudden craving for the McDonald's fraps lately. They're actually more fattening then Starbucks. I had a sudden craving for a McDonald's milkshake last night, but fought off the urge, and had a GNC Protein shake instead. It wasn't as good, but it got the craving to go.

Tomorrow is the big day when I start substitute teaching again. I get to start off the year in the worst possible assignment, In-School-Suspension. Hopefully they won't try me. I don't yell, but I know the office phone number and I'm not afraid to use it... So it's been a healthy eat day. I had some awesome pink lady apples from Trader Joe's, a grilled chicken fillet with a modest amount of Montgomery Inn Barbecue sauce on it, and I will have a modest snack in a few. About to jet... Thanks for all your support!!

In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

2nd Corinthians 4:7 - "But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us."

Monday, September 6, 2010

Happy Labor Day!!!


With Labor Day almost over, I hope all of you had an enjoyable day! I actually slept through most of it. It's funny, because the big Labor Day parade in my city goes right by my house. For years, I would take advantage of it, and set up a lemonade stand. I got the idea from my sisters who did it long before I did. We'd be lucky to get an extra ten bucks, but it was fun, and I guess it kept us out of trouble. The parade itself has pretty much lost it's flavor with me. It seems the same, and with people setting up their lawn chairs a long the street from 2am through the wee hours of the morning, it's become more annoying to me than anything. They don't let us park on the street during the hours of the parade, because it's reserved for the media. Why on earth they would want to cover the exact "same" parade all these years baffles me.

With all this apathetic thinking I've just displayed on this parade that if they canceled, it wouldn't affect me at all, it reminds me of the way we end up thinking about our spiritual lives. We as a nation have become too complacent with our own accomplishments, that we forget to serve others. The Bible talks about comparing our good deeds to that of God's grace, is like holding up filthy rags.

It's so easy to focus on self-pleasure. I'll be the first to admit I've struggled with this issue. Especially, when food or doing something that only benefited myself was involved. Notoriety is what every comic desires. To develop a following, and have people lining up, paying to see your performance. What more could someone who's written jokes for years, ask for?

This spiritual side of trying to lose weight and be healthy is definitely exposing who I really am, even more so to myself. We all wear masks. What kind are you wearing? What don't you want people to know about you? I guess my challenge would be to surrender yourself to God. There's nothing you can hide from Him. He knows everything, and He's never asked us to anything that He wasn't willing to help us accomplish.

Thank you guys for sticking with me on this journey. I got a few more subbing gigs coming up. One of which will be real trip as I get to be the In-School-Suspension sub. It's the worst position I've had to cover for in the past, because I'm laid back anyway, and they try to get away with murder when I'm in there. As I tweeted earlier, I'm gonna die... But I'll at least go down with a fight... I did weights today, and I'm no longer sore, so my body is getting used to it. Thanks again!

In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Isaiah 64:6 - All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags; we all shrivel up like a leaf, and like the wind our sins sweep us away.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Switching Ownership...


So I heard this awesome sermon today from one of my fellow comedian friends, the great Kenn Kington. The series theme was Switch: Getting Back On Track... Kenn talked about the parable of the talents in Matthew 25, which I mentioned in one of last week's blogs. But what really caught my attention was when he said we need to switch ownership. What we believe is ours, is actually God's, as He created this world. Once, we come to the realization, that we're just passing through, and what God has entrusted to us, was given so that we could glorify Him. Kenn said he'll never be the answer for World Hunger, but he can make a difference in one life by sponsoring one. We make a difference one life at a time.

One of my all-time favorite movie quotes (actually there's two from the same movie), Fight Club, Tyler Durden says "The things we own end up owning us." and "Only after you've lost everything, are you free to do anything." Those statements ring so true. I actually caught a classic episode of the Real Ghostbusters a few weeks ago, where this rich millionaire was about to die, so rather than leave his wealth to charity, he decided he was going to use this new invention to send it to the after-life, so he would be the richest ghost of all-time, but of course the Ghostbusters stopped him. I always pictured at least one person getting to Heaven and they go looking for a sledgehammer to take to the streets of gold. I wonder if that idea has even come into any mind that has entered in the place called paradise. One of the biggest traps we come into in this life is when we compare ourselves to other people. Keeping up with the Jones' they say... As out of shape as I've been that shouldn't be too hard for anyone else.

I believe the scariest movie scene of all-time isn't something from a Chucky, Jason or Freddy movie. It's not even from the Exorcist! The scariest movie scene of all-time is from Disney's Pinocchio.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07aD56TnVtc

I believe the biggest mistake made by Pinocchio and his friend, is they squandered what had been given to them. I believe so many people are guilty of this, and it's important, like Kenn said that we transfer the ownership to God. For He is in control, and we must follow Him.

This has been a wonderful journey thus far. I actually took a break from exercising today, and I will start fresh tomorrow. I did go out to eat with Kenn Kington, and probably ate more than what I should've, but tomorrow I will press on, and thank you guys for being a willing listener to my journey to being healthy...

In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Jeremiah 32:27 - "I am the LORD, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?"

Friday, September 3, 2010

"Elementary, Dear Watson..."


So I finally saw Sherlock Holmes today for the first time. I was disappointed at first, because I never read the classic Doyle novels, but I knew for a fact that Holmes was always able to figure out with reason why everything happened the way it did. The satanic rituals performed by Lord Blackwood had me wondering if he was using a supernatural power or if Holmes would be able to come up with an explanation. Of course, I hope you saw it, because I don't want to ruin it for you, but yes, Holmes did figure everything out. It was amazing, because nothing ever gets passed him. Plus, the mysterious man who kept appearing throughout the movie definitely gave them enough room to plan a sequel, and as I was watching the movie, I kept asking myself where's Moriarty in all this. Sad, I've never read the books, but I know Holmes' arch enemy's name. Go get 'em Robert Downy Jr... Your career has definitely been rejuvenated!!

The point to my summary of all this, is Holmes always had all the answers. Sometimes it took him a while to figure them out, but he never stopped growing in knowledge. From the time the movie started until the time it ended he was smarter within a hour than many of us could hope to be in a life-time. This applies to the journey I'm on. You try to eat healthy. Everyone has an answer for what you NEED to do to get in shape. I've heard everything, and some from people bigger than me. Not to discount what they have to say, but it's harder to follow someone who doesn't practice what they preach. That's where I'm trying to be better. The day you stop learning, is the day you stop being effective. The day you decide you don't want to grow spiritually, is the day you decide to be disobedient to God.

So not only am I working on being healthier physically, but the spiritual side is of greater importance. I did weights today, and stopped into my friendly neighborhood Trader Joe's again... Thank you guys for your support!!

In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

Matthew 6:33 - "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."

Thursday, September 2, 2010

The Baseball Story...


Yeah, so I just got back from a Dayton Dragons' Game. They faced the Bowling Green Hot Rods. For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about it's minor league baseball. Been so long since I followed baseball frequently. My Mom actually tried to get me into it during my childhood. She collected baseball cards for me, hoping one day I would take an interest. It never really caught on. Especially, after I was forced to play little league in third grade.

Long ago, my parents conceived the notion that this would be the best way to get me into shape.



So now that you realize the kid in right field was better than me, it doesn't get any more humbling than that. Except the first time I got up to bat, I had two strikes on me, and was terrified of my surroundings. I wanted to go home. With two strikes on me, the catcher looked up to me and said "Just swing at it..." Knowing I wanted nothing more that to be in the comfort of my own home playing Nintendo, I swung at a ball that was 3 feet above my head. This not only brought on laughs from the opposing team, but from my own team, including my coach. I didn't want to go back, but I did. The next time I got up to bat, I made up my mind, "No way am I going to swing!!" All of a sudden the Umpire looked up at me and said, "Alright son, take a base." What was he talking about? "Take a base!! You walked!" It dawned on me. You don't have to hit the ball to get on base. You can walk!!

That whole season, that was all I did!! My purpose was not to hit the ball and get on base. My purpose was to WALK!!! I even acquired the nickname "The Walker"... Until one day, when it caught up to me. We were playing against an undefeated team. With one out in the bottom of the ninth, they decided to send up the secret weapon... "THE WALKER!!!" I strutted up to home plate in my nice, white, clean uniform. I did my routine and walked, no challenge!

As I looked back to home plate I sighed in anguish, because the coach's son was up to bat. He had the dirtiest uniform on the team! I was going to have to run! The bases were loaded, and we were down by two. All of a sudden, "CRACK!!" He hit the ball. Mind you, I had asthma really bad, was pudgy and I was going as fast as I could. The two guys in front of me made it home and tied up the score. The coach's son was right behind me. His toes were right on my heels. He would've passed me if he was allowed. Before I knew it he was tagged out!!!

So now it's up to me!! If I make it we win. If I don't it's a tie. I'm almost positive I heard the Chariots of Fire theme song playing in the background. There was dust flying everywhere as the base coaches were screaming at me! I rounded third base and saw the ball flying out of the corner of my eye. Miraculously, it bounced off the catcher's glove and gave me enough time to launch my gravitorally challenged body on to home plate. I was the champion, my friend!!

I look back at this memory, which is most likely forgotten by the other teammates and probably even the coaches, and reflect on the preparation I had to win. Even now it applies to my life. As Christians, we are called to give our best. Nothing second rate should ever be presented as an offering to God. 1st Corinthians speaks of the runners in a race. Only one gets the prize, so they run in such a way as to get the prize. They practice by beating their bodies into submission so they will be conditioned to win. They don't walk. They run. So my challenge for myself, as well as those around me is to ask, are you doing your best for God?

Today, I did weights. I ate healthy, and of course had no ballpark food. I actually snuck in some healthy fruit leather from Trader Joe's. I have a subbing gig lined up for next week! Hopefully they call me tomorrow... Thanks again for all your support!!

IN HIM,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

1 Corinthians 9:24 - "Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize."

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

I'm Battle Cat!!!


For those of you who know me through facebook or even in the "REAL" world, you probably can tell I'm a very nostalgic guy. I love classic cartoons that I grew up on, which I hope hasn't gotten you psycho-analyzing me already. I've already been told all kinds of weird things, but truthfully, I just enjoy them. They're good conversational topics, and what have you. So with that said, I don't need to explain to you why I have the theme song from He-Man on my iPod in my exercise playlist. It happened to come on today as I was lifting weights. I did have the power... but how I got it was a different story...

Let's flashback to the days when I was actually running home from school to watch afternoon cartoons. He-Man was one of my all-time favorites!! My mom wasn't so thrilled with it, and actually refused to buy me Castle Greyskull because she thought it looked evil. (You see it above, because I bought it when I was 28 at this flea market, purely out of spite.) She knew the way to get me to do what I didn't want to do was to offer to buy me an action figure, so when I was at swim lessons and didn't want to jump off the diving board, she told me if I did the next time, she would buy me Battle Cat.

Many of you remember Battle Cat. He was He-Man's faithful companion, who when he wasn't Battle Cat, was Cringer, the fearful green tiger with yellow stripes. He was scared of everything!! Even as Prince Adam went to change into He-Man, he would aim the sword at Cringer who would shake even during his transformation to the mighty Battle Cat. But once he became Battle Cat, he would growl fearlessly, before letting out a mighty roar.



Call me nostalgic, maybe even childish, but I relate to Cringer more than I know, and many people I know do as well. We cower in fear of what the world tells us we should be, but Jesus Christ loves us beyond our ability to comprehend. Through Him we have the power!! So that's Who my power is though, and yes I did jump off the diving board that day and got Battle Cat!

I did weights, and walked three miles today. I also ate healthy. Thank you guys for allowing me to share with you, and for your support!!

In Christ,

Rich Jones
www.richjonescomedy.com

1 Corinthians 6:14 - "By his power God raised the Lord from the dead, and He will raise us also."